I had made two short trips last week and I have here Anne for three days. She is so special. With every word she gives you something. Love, humour, knowledge, whatever.
Among the other things we visited jewish cemetery in Leipzig with couple of another students and we got a by-the-way-lecture in jewish tomb stones symbols from one of the students. It was so interesting and I hope I will have time to do some research about the jewish part of my family. I also learned the hand from Izák on my window is Hamsa and lot of about kosher food. I love love love learning new things. The fact I don't know more than a tiny fragment of reality doesn't discourage me from studying further and deeper. The fact I am not very social often discourages me from being social. It is a spiral, because you can't practice social skills home and when yu don't practice, your social muscles gets atrophic and lazy. Yes, I am social lazy. I like to communicate, I like to speaking with patients and teaching and I love my friends, but I am so bad in getting to know new people and in small talk and random meetings. I like to being alone, traveling alone, eating alone, I like to be in the world of my book-heroes - alone. But when I overcome my social anxiety and lazyness, I actually like people. Getting know them, observe details, bodies (yes, some part of it is ED related, kind of reflex, but I generally like the diversity of bodies- hands, nails, eyebrows...), gestures, accents, habits. Everyone is so uniuque.
First step, first handshake, first words are always hard. And there are more than one first step. There are milions of first steps again and again. I can't learn any perfect first step or hand shake. I have to do them. Over and over.
Hands are such a perfect body part! These blessing hands on the tomb stones are symbolising the belonging to Kohen family. I wish you all some be'hatzlacha for this week!
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